Sometimes I think we parents think too much. I wonder if our parents ever put that much thought into which school to send us to when we were younger. I think my dad's decision was based solely on convenience, i.e. the closest school to home.
Once again we find ourselves debating on which school to send H to. I thought we had it all figured and concluded that H will go to a public chinese school for his primary years. But this subject is now open again...
Public chinese school was a clear option when we weighed all the pros and cons earlier. Granted there are all these horror stories about chinese school teachers, crazy workload, etc. but we wanted H to learn mandarin and are prepared to supplement his school time with outside activities to ensure that his creativity and command of English do not slip. Besides, we figured that kids should learn how to take hardship, life is not always rosy and they should not be over-protected. We do not want out kids to turn out to be brats with the sense of entitlement.
But our observation of H is getting us worried. H is just too passive or reserved. It takes a whole lot of cajolling before he would speak up or participate. He's afraid to bend rules, make mistakes and be judged. Simply put, he lacks assertiveness. And this is a problem. No matter how good you are academically, you will not fare well in life if you lack assertiveness. Although we've known this about H all along, we thought we could help him boost his confidence by enrolling him in drama and sports classes, but so far we've not seen much improvement. The trigger point was when I asked him about school a few nights back and he just kept quiet. I had to probe, probe and probe (in a nice and playful manner) before he divulge about his friends. I'm not even sure why he can't or won't talk about what he does in school, about his teachers and his friends, etc. He's only 4+ now and he can't talk to his mommy. I can't even bear to imagine what it will be like when he's a teenager. Will he then shut us out of his life? Is H afraid that he will say something inappropriate and that we will judge him? We've never judged him or belittled him before, ever, so how can this be so? All these unanswered questions are bugging me. So I talked to Hubs and we think that perhaps H, with his personality, is not suited for the chinese school environment as it will only reinforce his passiveness. We're still not sure if a private or international school will do him good but at least he'll be forced to speak up and express himself (hopefully). And with the many years of training he should be able to change.
Meantime, I've bought this book "Cool, Calm, Confident : A Workbook to Help Kids Learn Assertiveness Skills" so that I can start teaching H how to be assertive. Can't wait for the book to arrive, this will be our new bedtime story!
Thursday, 6 December 2012
Wednesday, 5 December 2012
Math Monkey
I took H to a trial class at Math Monkey today. Despite my reluctance to put him in any academic-type enrichment programme (see my previous post on mental maths), I thought I should just check it out anyway. My sister did some research on the various math programmes available out there (so that saved me some trouble) before enrolling my niece who's now in standard 1 in Eye Level (previosuly known as Enopi). But she suggested I check out Math Monkey cos they incorporate games in their curriculum, hence more fun. The reason why my niece isn't going to Math Monkey is that you need to start young (i.e. from 4) else you'd not be able to catch up on the techniques.
So as usual, I had to prep H about going to the class. I was quite surprised he did not reject the idea when I told him we'll be going for a math class at Math Monkey (I also made a light joke out of it about monkeys doing math, etc. so that he wouldn't feel intimidated). The first thing the teacher did was to give him an assessment (4-year old paper) to test his level. Of course he wouldn't go into class alone, so Po-Po went in and sat with him. After the test, Po-Po was told to leave the room so that he can continue with the trial lesson but he wouldn't hear of that, so Po-Po left the room and I went in instead.
The trial lesson was at the Green Monkey Troop level with about 6 other kids all around H's age (4+ years old). Today's lesson was about Bigger and Smaller. The teacher drew a staircase and wrote 0 to 10 in ascending order up the stairs. The kids were told that the numbers become bigger as you go up the stairs and smaller as you come down the stairs. They were then told to count 0 to 10 as the teacher pointed up the stairs and 10 to 0 as the teacher pointed down the stairs. Then the teacher wrote pairs of numbers on the board and asked the children which number in each pair was bigger or smaller. This was way too simple for H since he's already mastered his numbers.
Next it was game time. The kids were divided into 2 groups. The teacher will flash a question and whichever group gave the answer first will win 2 points. H actually participated in the game and he was happily beaming away cos his team was leading all the way. The game was to fill in the missing number. E.g. 5, _, 7. Again this was way to easy for H.
After the game, the kids were asked to do a worksheet from their folder. Since H did not have a folder (he's not a student yet), the teacher asked him to go to the board in front and tested him. She asked him to count backwards from 10 to 0 and write the numbers on the board, she gave him more number pairs and asked him to circle the smaller number in each pair, she gave him more fill in the missing number questions - all he did with ease. The teacher then asked him to sit for the 5-year old assessment paper. Again he did it with ease and got all the answers correct.
In the same room, at the back of the class, there were 2 other boys being taught by another teacher. They were learning about division (lesson was on halving). And the teacher had written on the board a list of numbers, something like that (I think they read half of xx = yy):
H20 -> 10
H40 -> 20
.
.
.
H was actually more interested in what the big boys were learning. H asked "mommy what are the kor kor learning?" I told him they're learning halving, e.g. half of 20 is 10. H then said "if you have 40 candies and share, each one will get 20?"
What's my take on Math Monkey?
If you've read my previous post you'd have read that my concern is that these math centres teach techniques to perform calculations but not math concepts. It's good for kids who already have the fundamentals, since all you want out of the programme is to equip them with the techniques to perform mental calculations with speed and accuracy. But for kids who don't have the fundamentals, then we're just training robots to churn out answers without really understanding the meaning of the numbers. I cannot really conclude whether concepts are actually taught in Math Monkey since I've only attended one lesson (and a simple lesson at that - perhaps at the higher levels the lessons are taught differently).
For example, in today's lesson when the kids were taught about bigger and smaller, the teacher asked, "Why is 8 bigger than 4?". I was expecting her to show quantities, something concrete, so that the kids can witness for themselves that 8 is bigger or more than 4. Instead she said, "because it's higher up the stairs", pointing to the stairs she drew on the board. I didn't think that was right. It's perhaps a good way to make the kids remember, but it certainly isn't the right way to teach quantities.
Would I send H to Math Monkey?
If H does not have the strong math concepts that he has, NO! Since he loves numbers and loves doing maths, MAYBE. I'd certainly not send him if he's at the Green Monkey Troop level. For H, he's placed at the Lemur Troop level in which mental math techniques will be introduced. It'll definitely be something new and interesting to him. Besides, participating in the games will help him come out of his 'shy' self.
At the end of the lesson, I asked H whether he enjoyed himself and whether he wanted to go again, he nodded yes. So maybe we'll give it a try :-)
So as usual, I had to prep H about going to the class. I was quite surprised he did not reject the idea when I told him we'll be going for a math class at Math Monkey (I also made a light joke out of it about monkeys doing math, etc. so that he wouldn't feel intimidated). The first thing the teacher did was to give him an assessment (4-year old paper) to test his level. Of course he wouldn't go into class alone, so Po-Po went in and sat with him. After the test, Po-Po was told to leave the room so that he can continue with the trial lesson but he wouldn't hear of that, so Po-Po left the room and I went in instead.
The trial lesson was at the Green Monkey Troop level with about 6 other kids all around H's age (4+ years old). Today's lesson was about Bigger and Smaller. The teacher drew a staircase and wrote 0 to 10 in ascending order up the stairs. The kids were told that the numbers become bigger as you go up the stairs and smaller as you come down the stairs. They were then told to count 0 to 10 as the teacher pointed up the stairs and 10 to 0 as the teacher pointed down the stairs. Then the teacher wrote pairs of numbers on the board and asked the children which number in each pair was bigger or smaller. This was way too simple for H since he's already mastered his numbers.
Next it was game time. The kids were divided into 2 groups. The teacher will flash a question and whichever group gave the answer first will win 2 points. H actually participated in the game and he was happily beaming away cos his team was leading all the way. The game was to fill in the missing number. E.g. 5, _, 7. Again this was way to easy for H.
After the game, the kids were asked to do a worksheet from their folder. Since H did not have a folder (he's not a student yet), the teacher asked him to go to the board in front and tested him. She asked him to count backwards from 10 to 0 and write the numbers on the board, she gave him more number pairs and asked him to circle the smaller number in each pair, she gave him more fill in the missing number questions - all he did with ease. The teacher then asked him to sit for the 5-year old assessment paper. Again he did it with ease and got all the answers correct.
In the same room, at the back of the class, there were 2 other boys being taught by another teacher. They were learning about division (lesson was on halving). And the teacher had written on the board a list of numbers, something like that (I think they read half of xx = yy):
H20 -> 10
H40 -> 20
.
.
.
H was actually more interested in what the big boys were learning. H asked "mommy what are the kor kor learning?" I told him they're learning halving, e.g. half of 20 is 10. H then said "if you have 40 candies and share, each one will get 20?"
What's my take on Math Monkey?
If you've read my previous post you'd have read that my concern is that these math centres teach techniques to perform calculations but not math concepts. It's good for kids who already have the fundamentals, since all you want out of the programme is to equip them with the techniques to perform mental calculations with speed and accuracy. But for kids who don't have the fundamentals, then we're just training robots to churn out answers without really understanding the meaning of the numbers. I cannot really conclude whether concepts are actually taught in Math Monkey since I've only attended one lesson (and a simple lesson at that - perhaps at the higher levels the lessons are taught differently).
For example, in today's lesson when the kids were taught about bigger and smaller, the teacher asked, "Why is 8 bigger than 4?". I was expecting her to show quantities, something concrete, so that the kids can witness for themselves that 8 is bigger or more than 4. Instead she said, "because it's higher up the stairs", pointing to the stairs she drew on the board. I didn't think that was right. It's perhaps a good way to make the kids remember, but it certainly isn't the right way to teach quantities.
Would I send H to Math Monkey?
If H does not have the strong math concepts that he has, NO! Since he loves numbers and loves doing maths, MAYBE. I'd certainly not send him if he's at the Green Monkey Troop level. For H, he's placed at the Lemur Troop level in which mental math techniques will be introduced. It'll definitely be something new and interesting to him. Besides, participating in the games will help him come out of his 'shy' self.
At the end of the lesson, I asked H whether he enjoyed himself and whether he wanted to go again, he nodded yes. So maybe we'll give it a try :-)
Tuesday, 4 December 2012
Learning through play
Learning through play - this is indeed so true! While observing H in his pretend play, I realised just how much he learns by simply indulging in play. These couple of days, he's been playing 'ice-cream shop' - he's the ice-cream seller and everyone else his customers. All he needed for his pretend play was his magnadoodle board (one of the most value for money toys since he's been using it over and over for all kinds of play), some blocks as ice-cream, cookies or whatever there is in his menu, and a stack of cards as money.
Unconsiously while having loads of fun, H is learning how to spell by writing out his menu board, learning math by calculating how much to charge his customers and how much change to give, and learning how to deal with his little sister who just loves disturbing him while he plays.
This is H's menu:
Jelly $1
Cookie $2
Ice cream $3
Spelling
H: Mommy how do you spell cream?
Me: Cream as in ice-cream? C-R-E-A-M
The next day
H: Mommy you don't need to tell me, I can spell ice-cream by myself
Math
H: What would you like?
Me: Triple scoop of vanilla ice-cream with rainbow sprinkles and a cookie
H: There you go!
Me: How much?
H: 3 ice-cream is $9... and a cookie $11 <I'm amazed at his speed of calculation>
Me: There you go, $15. How much change do I get?
H: <Hid in the corner and counted with his fingers> $4
Emotional intelligence
H: Mommy, L is taking away my cookies! <in all his whininess while trying to hit his sister>
Me: It's ok, she just wants to play with you
H: No, she can't play!
L loves provoking H to evoke a reaction. Perhaps it's her way to get his attention. The way to deal with her is to simple ignore her actions, or distract her with something else. After explaining this to H, I told H to include L as his assistant or give her something else to play with. There, settled! No more whining, crying and fighting.
Unconsiously while having loads of fun, H is learning how to spell by writing out his menu board, learning math by calculating how much to charge his customers and how much change to give, and learning how to deal with his little sister who just loves disturbing him while he plays.
This is H's menu:
Jelly $1
Cookie $2
Ice cream $3
Spelling
H: Mommy how do you spell cream?
Me: Cream as in ice-cream? C-R-E-A-M
The next day
H: Mommy you don't need to tell me, I can spell ice-cream by myself
Math
H: What would you like?
Me: Triple scoop of vanilla ice-cream with rainbow sprinkles and a cookie
H: There you go!
Me: How much?
H: 3 ice-cream is $9... and a cookie $11 <I'm amazed at his speed of calculation>
Me: There you go, $15. How much change do I get?
H: <Hid in the corner and counted with his fingers> $4
Emotional intelligence
H: Mommy, L is taking away my cookies! <in all his whininess while trying to hit his sister>
Me: It's ok, she just wants to play with you
H: No, she can't play!
L loves provoking H to evoke a reaction. Perhaps it's her way to get his attention. The way to deal with her is to simple ignore her actions, or distract her with something else. After explaining this to H, I told H to include L as his assistant or give her something else to play with. There, settled! No more whining, crying and fighting.
Monday, 3 December 2012
the true meaning of unschooling
I came across this post by LearningBeyondSchooling. How timely - just what I needed to reaffirm myself that it is ok not to have a fixed schedule for H when he's out of school next year. I guess we, being parents, can never get the kiasu-ness out of us, no matter how un-kiasu we think we are. On one hand, we recognise that kids should be kids and they should be allowed to enjoy their childhood and indulge in free play. On the other hand, we're afraid that they will miss out on opportunities to acquire new skills or hone their talent if structured learning is not provided. Hence the dilemma.
Our intention for taking H out of school next year is to allow him to PLAY but along the way we unconsciously get sucked back into the 'box', i.e. needing to find classes / activities to fill H's time - tennis, swimming, music, art, mandarin, etc. and the list goes on...
I would really appreciate to hear from parents who homeschool their kids. How do you do it?
Our intention for taking H out of school next year is to allow him to PLAY but along the way we unconsciously get sucked back into the 'box', i.e. needing to find classes / activities to fill H's time - tennis, swimming, music, art, mandarin, etc. and the list goes on...
I would really appreciate to hear from parents who homeschool their kids. How do you do it?
home sweet home
Just got back from our family holiday in Perth. It is our first holiday abroad with both kids and hubs vowed not to take them anywhere until they are much older. I guess hubs idea of a good holiday is a relaxing one where you just sit back and do nothing. But with kids, you end up being more tired than ever... hahaha.
But it was a good trip nonetheless. At least for the kids (I hope). As soon as H hit home, he went on his days as usual without a single mention of the trip. I guess he's one of those who lives in the moment and does not care much about the past. Unlike L, she has vivid memory of the trip (for now at least). Every single waking moment she would ask to look at the videos or photos taken of the trip. She would also randomly talk about the things she saw or did at the farm or at the zoo.
Lessons learnt? Don't try to be too ambitious when going on hols with young kids. They're just happy spending time with family doing simple things like playing in the park, going to the pool, etc. For our next family holiday, we should just check into a beach resort :-)
But it was a good trip nonetheless. At least for the kids (I hope). As soon as H hit home, he went on his days as usual without a single mention of the trip. I guess he's one of those who lives in the moment and does not care much about the past. Unlike L, she has vivid memory of the trip (for now at least). Every single waking moment she would ask to look at the videos or photos taken of the trip. She would also randomly talk about the things she saw or did at the farm or at the zoo.
Lessons learnt? Don't try to be too ambitious when going on hols with young kids. They're just happy spending time with family doing simple things like playing in the park, going to the pool, etc. For our next family holiday, we should just check into a beach resort :-)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)