fierce teachers

H is such a sensitive little boy. Last night after putting him in bed he said he wanted to chit chat. I must make it a point to have chats with H. There isn't enough time to do so cos most days by the time I get home, I probably only have about an hour with the kids before I have to get them ready for bed. That one hour would be spent playing, reading, etc. It was good that I had a gathering with my old schoolmates last Friday who reminded me that young kids like H also need an emotional outlet cos we'd never know what is happening in school unless we talk to them about it. Normally I'd just say, "No more talking, go to sleep!", but last night I was happy I had a chat with H.

Me: So how was your first day back in school?
H: Very good... <he was smiling but I sensed some hesitation>

Then he said he didn't want to go to the school anymore cos the teachers scolded. I had to probe and question to find out exactly what happened. Sometimes it's hard to understand H cos he has difficulty articulating what he wants to say. Long story short, there are a few teachers who according to him are fierce and like to scare children. I asked if they scolded him he said no, but they scolded his friends. After much probing, I found out H's definition of scolding isn't really scolding. For example, the teacher will tell his friend who's day dreaming "You're day dreaming, E!". To him, since the teacher said it in a loud voice, that is scolding. I asked if the teachers punished, he said no. I asked if the teachers scolded if they ask questions or don't know how to do something, he said no. Whew!! So I guess H is just being overly sensitive. I then told him it's ok, the teachers aren't really scolding, they just wanted the children to pay attention and learn.

Then H told me his class teachers said he is lousy at colouring. I was initially aghast. How can the teachers pass derogatory remarks like that? Surely that will affect the child's self-esteem. I was thinking to myself that if that's true I'll need to have a word with the teachers. But before I started probing, H corrected himself, "no they didn't say lousy they said I was slow at colouring". I asked if the teacher told him that, he said no, he overheard the teachers saying that.

When I told Hubs about what H told me about his teachers, he said, "Good, that will toughen him up." I believe it's important for parents to not overprotect their kids and allow them to learn how to deal with tough situations, but we have to also take care of their emotional wellbeing (especially for a sensitive child like H). So it's really a fine balance and it's not always easy to know where to draw the line.