Sleep training

Training L to sleep on her own seemed to be easier than I imagined. It's been a week plus now and she's already sleeping on her own. I think this has very much to do with her personality. How should I describe her? Hmmm... can't say she's as brave as her brother cos she doesn't like the dark and would never ever venture upstairs on her own if everyone's downstairs. "I'm too scared!" she always says. So I figured it must be her kiasu-ness that made up for her fear of the dark. She's one who never admits defeat, and loves to show off.

The first two nights, I had to stay with her until she fell asleep. 

The next two nights, she became more confident. Although still a little scared of the dark, she insisted she can sleep on her own but as soon as we left the room she came out and started sobbing quietly, not wanting to alert anyone. 

Lots of praise and encouragement went on. "Mummy's so proud of you. Although you were scared but you still tried to sleep on your own!"

Big brother H also chipped in "Kor kor is also so proud of you!"

We then got her a night light and set up the baby monitor in her room.

"See, now you have light so your room's not dark anymore. And you don't have to come out of your room if you need anything, you just need to sit up in your bed and call and we'll hear you!"

She was extremely fascinated with the baby monitor, running between her room and the nanny's room to test if it worked.

And the next few nights were a breeze. "You can go back to your room, I can sleep on my own!"

And that was it, L's sleep training is done!!!  So proud of my little girl!

Oh no, my CL bailed on me

Yes you heard right, my confinement lady has just bailed on me. Got a call from her 2 days ago informing us that she fell while spring cleaning her house and has broken her collar bone. Said it's unlikely she will recover in time to take on the job. Oh well, I guess it's really not her fault but at such a last minute, how to find a replacement?!!

We've been frantically calling up other CLs recommended by friends but as usual, all good ones are taken. Worst case is to take her friend whom she's referred us to as her replacement but that means we'll be taking chances since we don't know her friend. Thinking positively, this may be a blessing in disguise. Who knows, maybe her friend will turn out to be a gem of a CL :-)

Keeping all my fingers crossed!!!

Week 33

I'm already into week 33 of my pregnancy, how time flies. H is getting more excited and has been asking if we can get the baby out NOW! L is more cool about it. I think she's still too young to really comprehend how a new baby will affect her life. At least she's nice about it but I can really see the difference in H between this baby and when I was pregnant with L. He seems to really care and love the baby. Every single moment with H, he will be touching, kissing and talking to the baby (my belly).

It's now time to 'train' L to sleep on her own. I've told her nanny she'll be sleeping in the spare room starting tonight. L will have to sleep on her own. Hopefully she won't resist. I told her last night that she's now a big girl and she has to sleep all by herself and she said ok. Let's see how it goes tonight (keeping my fingers crossed)!

I'm also starting to feel the strain of this pregnancy now that my belly is getting bigger. Apparently the baby is starting to gain ~1 kg a month. A month ago during the check up it was 1.3kg, last week when I went for a check up it was 2.2kg, so in another 3 weeks when I go for my next check up it should be around 3kg already. My obgyn is trying to get us to schedule a c-section date - anytime between 18-22 Feb she said. I'm gonna try to schedule it as close to my EDD as possible cos I still think it's best the baby decides when he's ready to pop.

teaching kids values (part 2)

One of the biggest arguments against sending kids to an international school is this whole thing about cultivating strong values. No doubt the school environment plays a part but I think the home environment plays a much bigger part. It is unfortunate that we don't spend enough time with the kids on weekdays. Hubs normally only comes home when the kids are already asleep. As for me, I try to get home as soon as I can. It helps now that my travelling time is shorter since we've moved closer to where we work, but still, by the time I finish dinner, it's almost time for the kids to get ready for bed. So at most, I only get to spend 1-1.5 hours with them before the lights go off.

H will always want to chit chat and I always feel bad that I have to cut our chit chat time cos he needs to get enough sleep.

H: Can we chit chat some more?
Me: Nope we can chit chat tomorrow, you need to sleep now!

As I close his room door I always feel guilty. What if he stops wanting to chit chat with his mommy? What if he thinks I don't care enough?

The saving grace is that we can chit chat in the car on the way to school. Hubs feels that we should get a transporter since the traffic getting out of H's school to work can be horrendous in the morning. On average, the travelling time from home to school to office is about 1.5 hours. But that will mean losing our precious chit chat time. I really don't mind the travelling time, at least it gives me time to talk to H. By understanding what went on during his day in school or at home (e.g. something someone said, or something someone did, or simply something he encountered, etc.), I'll be able to provide him with the right perspectives or help him set things right.

This morning while driving to school, we drove past a construction site. Then he saw a few foreign workers walking towards the site and asked "Are they going to work? Why aren't they driving?"

Kids are so simple minded. Just because they get driven everywhere and they see mommy and daddy and the people they know drive to work, they automatically assume everyone has a car.

"Not everyone has a car, dear. Some people walk to work, some people take the bus, some people take the train"
"Why?"
"Because buying and maintaining a car is not cheap. You have to pay for the car and pay for petrol"

Then came my lessons about having to work hard, to be prudent, cannot waste, blah blah blah... Hopefully having these daily short chit chats is good enough to reinforce the right traits and values in H. Now I have to think about L. How do I find time to do the same with her?

teaching kids values

If I could, I would like to be the one spending most time with my kids. It baffles me sometimes what my kids say. I think it must be from the people they interact most with. In the case of L, that will be her nanny. Don't get me wrong, we love L's nanny to bits. She's extremely patient with the kids, and very soft spoken. The only thing I find with old aunties are they like to pass judgmental comments (e.g. saying someone is fat or something is ugly, etc.) and being superficial and judgmental is not what you want your kids to pick up.

Yesterday while having dinner with L, I asked her about school and her new friends. She was telling me about her new class and other random stuff and then she made this comment that made me sit up.

"Some girls are pretty and some girls are ugly"

Not knowing how to react, my first response was "all girls are pretty in their own way darling, there's no such thing as being ugly."

Then I added, "having a pretty face is not enough, you need to have a good heart. That will make you beautiful so everyone can be beautiful!"

I wasn't sure if she was paying attention to what I said because she started rattling on about other things. But I must find other opportunities to reinforce my message to her. Now how do I tell L's nanny to not pass judgmental comments about others in front of the kids? I don't want her to think that I'm accusing her of any wrongdoing. I just want to remind her that we should all be careful of what we say in front of the kids. So how?!!!

H's first day in Year 1

Today marks H's first day in Year 1. I think I'm just excited as he is. He seems to like his brand new school, being all smiley in the morning despite having to wake up at 6:30am. The school set up is definitely way better than his previous school. I especially like the classroom - very spacious and cheery, with full height windows overlooking the garden outside.

Let's hope everything works out well and that he enjoys going to school :-)

View from the canteen. H's classroom is the one on the right (ground floor)