The things L says

My little baby is really getting chattier by the day. Everyone who meets her for the first time would guess that she's at least 3 years old (some even asks if she's 4, which is rather far fetched considering her small petite frame) as she's really articulate for a 2 year old.

The other day at the restaurant, L was happily hitting the plate with her chopsticks. She was making so much noise I told her to stop.
Me: L, please stop. This is not a drum
L: I know but I'm pretending that it is a drum

Then we went for dessert and she ordered soya jelly. Looks really yummy...
Me: Can you share with mummy some?
L: No, I have sore throat, later you also get sore throat (which is not true cos she doesn't have sore throat)

Her favourite phrase now to her brother whenever he disturbs her or when they fight
L (to her brother): You ar, very naughty boy!
L (to me): Mommy can you please put kor kor in the dustbin and let the cat take him?

Entrance assessment

It seems like I'm busier than ever when I don't go to work. The kids have been all over me I don't even have time to blog.

Last Wednesday, we took H for the school entrance assessment. It was the last assessment for the year to make it into Jan 2013 intake. I really don't know why they had to start the assessment so early (at 9am), and we had to travel all the way to Cheras. Since both hubs and I weren't familiar with the place, we thought we'd better leave early. H was really well prepped. There was an unusual sense of maturity in him that morning. He was up and having breakfast all by himself by the time I got out of the room (and ready to wake him up). Then he got into the car without any fuss, knowing we were going to the big school. We didn't tell him he was going for an entrance assessment, rather he was required to do some worksheets with some other children so that the teachers know how much he's learnt and can teach him new things. He seemed ok with the idea.

We arrived about 15 minutes early and there were some children training in the pool. H was fascinated to watch them swim laps. I told him that he'll be also taught how to swim just like those big kor kor and cheh cheh.  Swimming is compulsory and is part of the core curriculum. When it was time to go into the room, he happily sat down on the table labelled with his name. I was rather surprised he didn't insist that we stayed in the room with him.

First was the Math paper. I think it must be rather easy. I sneaked a glance and saw a few questions, e.g. colouring the bigger of 2 numbers in the squares, filling in the missing number in the sequence, etc. I wasn't sure if there were any equations (i.e. additions and subtractions) but when I asked H at the end of the assessment how was the Math paper, he said there was no Math paper. I guess he associates Math with equations, so no equation means no Math.

When we went in to sneak a peek at him after 10 minutes, he's finished his Math paper and was given the English paper. That was really quick. Other kids were still working on their Math paper. Great, that means we can head home early! So I thought. After about half an hour, I told hubs to go check on him. Hubs came back laughing, H was busy 'decorating' his name with different colours, and he's not started on his paper. The thing about H, he sometimes needs to be given instructions. I guess the teacher just handed him the paper and he didn't know what to do.. hehehe. So he just sat there and wrote his name, then got bored and started 'decorating' his name. One of the teachers then came and gave him instructions (I guess she finally noticed him sitting there bored). Hubs said the paper was quite difficult. Obviously you can't expect a 4 year old to know grammar. They are also tested on their reading ability. Hubs didn't stay long to watch so we don't really know what other questions were in the paper.

The last paper was supposed to be the Science paper. What would a 4 year old know about science I really am not sure. But after about 15 minutes from when he actually started doing his English paper H came out. We asked if he was done he said yes. Hmmm... we asked if he did the Science paper he said he didn't know. Alamak <slaps forehead>! That's also another thing with H, you really can't get any proper answers from him. We asked him what was in his Science paper he said he doesn't know, it's a secret. So we asked the teacher if we can go, she said yes, he's done. So I guess he was really done.

On the way back I asked H why didn't he start doing the English paper. He said he didn't know what to do. I guess you can't expect kids that age to be able to read instructions. I asked him why didn't he ask the teacher. He said they were busy with other kids. Aiyoh this H really should learn how to be more assertive. I then told him next time he should put up his hand otherwise the teacher won't know he needs help.

Anyway we are glad it's over and really proud of H for being so independent :-)

It's now final, H is going to Reception

We've finally made up our minds. Payment's been issued, so there's no turning back. Our little big boy will be going to Reception next year. Have we made the right choice? We'd never know. But we'd like to believe that we've made the best choice we can based on our circumstances.

When I went to pick H from Po-Po's house yesterday, I told her we've registered H in the international school. Po-Po's really supportive of our decision, but Gong-Gong thinks otherwise. His exact words, "Why are you wasting money? He's a smart boy. Just send him to a chinese school and save the money for university". There's really no point arguing with my dad, so I just let him nag on, "All of you went to a chinese school and you all turned out alright...." blah blah blah...

There are of course pros and cons for the different education routes you can take. There's not one perfect option. Different people have different experiences and hence different perspectives, but one should never generalise. Some kids will thrive in any environment, others won't. You just have to pay attention to and really understand your child - his personality and his learning style. Will H cope well in a chinese school? He probably would since he's a fast learner so I don't think he'd struggle academically. But will it bring out the best in him, maybe not.

So I'm really happy with the decision, except that I have to now bid farewell to my early retirement plan *sob sob*

When should you start learning ABCs and 123s

I have often blogged about H and it's time I talk a little about my little girl L. Hubs at times passes comments that at L's age, H already knows his phonics and numbers extremely well. Perhaps it's high time we start teaching her? I normally just brushes it off by saying "It's ok she's only 2. She'll start learning when she's ready".

Being siblings, H and L are as different as day and night. H displayed keen interest in letters and numbers from a very young age. And being extremely inquisitive and borderline obsessive, he will go on and on the same subject for weeks. L, on the other hand, has not really displayed the same interest in letters or numbers. She loves stories, but if you so much as try to teach her letters or numbers, she'll lose interest and walks away. She's however, extremely articulate for her age. She can hold conversations and even argue with you. Her ability to comprehend is also amazing. For example, I'll read her a new book once and ask her questions about the story and she would be able to answer me correctly, which means she really understands the plot. Once her teacher from Tweedlewink actually asked if L has photographic memory. And she's always listening to other people's conversations although she seems to be busy playing. Once I had a leaking pipe and the plumber failed to rectify it despite several attempts so I got rather frustrated and vented to my dad when he came over. We were talking over the gate while the kids were playing outside. That same evening, L asked me, "Mommy why did you say the plumber was silly?" Then she answered her own question, "He didn't fix it".

So I'm confident that L will pick up her ABCs and 123s when she's ready. For now, I'm just happy for her to play, sing and dance. I'll perhaps only start worrying when she turns 4.

International school search (part 2)

While attending a birthday party yesterday, we were told that Sri KDU has recently introduced its international primary school. We were really excited. We went to its Open Day a while back (for the private school - national curriculum) and were rather impressed. In fact, hubs wanted to register H there and then but I stopped him cos it was way to early to make a decision on H's education. That must have been 2 years back. After that, we've kind of decided to put him in a chinese school (thank god we did not pay the registration fee) until a week or so back.

So we had to go check the school out today. For similar fees, Sri KDU definitely has better facilities. We had rather high expectations when we went to the school, but was rather disappointed. No doubt the facilities are top notched, but somehow we did not get the same assurance we got from the other school, i.e. we're not too convinced about the academic side of things and the teachers' quality. Perhaps it's to do with the marketing lady we spoke to, who does not seem to know much (yes, they don't have an admission department, only a marketing department). Perhaps it's also to do with it being very new (only started in Sept 2012 with 3 classes - Year 1, Year 2/3 combined, Year 4/5 combined).

I guess our choice of school is clear then.

Our search begins...

Today we visited the school we're planning to send H to. It's not like we have many choices, since there are only a handful of schools befitting our criteria. Our requirements are quite simple, really :p

1. Location - must be conveniently located, i.e. either near our house or near our workplace. We're not about to sit through rush hour traffic in the morning just to get H to school. I'm already dreading the ungodly hour we have to get up. Waking H up will also be a problem
2. Compulsory Mandarin subject - we still want H to learn Mandarin. He may not end up to be as proficient as those kids attending chinese schools, but I guess knowing the basics is better than knowing none
3. Emphasis on Asian values - while we want H to be exposed to an international curriculum and the 'international' way of teaching/learning, we still want him to be grounded in the Asian values, e.g. having discipline, respect for others, etc.

So back to the school. We're pretty happy with what we've learnt, we felt that the school provides a good balance between being international yet somewhat still rooted in the local values. Teachers are a mixed of locals and expatriates. We were assured that they do not compromise on teacher quality, we were also assured that there's no drilling - we want our kids to be active learners and not just memorise, memorise, memorise! We looked at the books and the curriculum seems interesting (way more interesting than what we used to learn in school). Although there is a strong focus on the academic-side, there is equal emphasis on the non-academic side (whew!).

However, the school building is rather old and the facilities aren't as swanky as some of the other international schools. They should really do something about this, but I guess they're good enough for reception/primary years so we aren't too fuss at the moment.

Now I have to prep H for the admission assessment next week. Since parents are not allowed to be in the room with the kid, I'm not sure how he will take it. He may start crying and decide he doesn't want to do the assessment. Stress... stresss... stress... I'm still not sure how to prep him.

international school

It's been decided (I hope this time it's final) that H will be going to an international school. Despite our preference for him to have a solid foundation in Mandarin and a solid grounding in Asian values, i.e. to attend a public chinese primary school, we've decided on the next best option due for the following reasons:

1. A chinese school may not be conducive for a child like H. He's very inquisitive, he loves learning and is full of imagination (strengths) but he's also very shy and passive (weaknesses). We need an environment that will not stifle his strengths while developing his weaknesses.
2. We do not want to stagnate his learning. If we were to send him to a public school, it will be another 2 years (year 2015) before he enters primary one, just to start learning the things he already knows. He'll either be bored to death or lose interest in learning. The school we're considering implements Year 1 british curriculum for their reception year. This will be great for H since he won't have to repeat learning what he's already mastered.

Next step is to take H on a tour of the school and have him sit for the admission assessment. It's really really a last minute decision. Apparently the kids who've registered are already collecting their books, uniforms, etc this week and orientation is scheduled on the last day of December. Here we are still researching for schools. But just to prep H, we've told him that he will be going to a big boy school next year. He's pretty excited and asked if he can see the school, so that's a good sign. But I can't seem to stop worrying if it will be too much a culture shock for H to be in a big school. For starters, he has to start waking up early (much much earlier) as school starts at 8am and he can't be late (he used to be always late for school since we're not too bothered, it's only a preschool). Then he has to adapt to the long school hours since school only finishes at 2pm (he sometimes still naps after lunch so that has to change). Then of course he has to get used to the large school environment, being picked up and dropped off at the school entrance and making his own way to the classroom, etc.

Alternatively, we can just keep him at home as initially planned, and let him start Year 1 in Spetember 2013 instead of Reception in January 2013.

Flip flopping decision on H's education

Sometimes I think we parents think too much. I wonder if our parents ever put that much thought into which school to send us to when we were younger. I think my dad's decision was based solely on convenience, i.e. the closest school to home.

Once again we find ourselves debating on which school to send H to. I thought we had it all figured and concluded that H will go to a public chinese school for his primary years. But this subject is now open again...

Public chinese school was a clear option when we weighed all the pros and cons earlier. Granted there are all these horror stories about chinese school teachers, crazy workload, etc. but we wanted H to learn mandarin and are prepared to supplement his school time with outside activities to ensure that his creativity and command of English do not slip. Besides, we figured that kids should learn how to take hardship, life is not always rosy and they should not be over-protected. We do not want out kids to turn out to be brats with the sense of entitlement.

But our observation of H is getting us worried. H is just too passive or reserved. It takes a whole lot of cajolling before he would speak up or participate. He's afraid to bend rules, make mistakes and be judged. Simply put, he lacks assertiveness. And this is a problem. No matter how good you are academically, you will not fare well in life if you lack assertiveness. Although we've known this about H all along, we thought we could help him boost his confidence by enrolling him in drama and sports classes, but so far we've not seen much improvement. The trigger point was when I asked him about school a few nights back and he just kept quiet. I had to probe, probe and probe (in a nice and playful manner) before he divulge about his friends. I'm not even sure why he can't or won't talk about what he does in school, about his teachers and his friends, etc. He's only 4+ now and he can't talk to his mommy. I can't even bear to imagine what it will be like when he's a teenager. Will he then shut us out of his life? Is H afraid that he will say something inappropriate and that we will judge him? We've never judged him or belittled him before, ever, so how can this be so? All these unanswered questions are bugging me. So I talked to Hubs and we think that perhaps H, with his personality, is not suited for the chinese school environment as it will only reinforce his passiveness. We're still not sure if a private or international school will do him good but at least he'll be forced to speak up and express himself (hopefully). And with the many years of training he should be able to change.

Meantime, I've bought this book "Cool, Calm, Confident : A Workbook to Help Kids Learn Assertiveness Skills" so that I can start teaching H how to be assertive. Can't wait for the book to arrive, this will be our new bedtime story!

Math Monkey

I took H to a trial class at Math Monkey today. Despite my reluctance to put him in any academic-type enrichment programme (see my previous post on mental maths), I thought I should just check it out anyway. My sister did some research on the various math programmes available out there (so that saved me some trouble) before enrolling my niece who's now in standard 1 in Eye Level (previosuly known as Enopi). But she suggested I check out Math Monkey cos they incorporate games in their curriculum, hence more fun. The reason why my niece isn't going to Math Monkey is that you need to start young (i.e. from 4) else you'd not be able to catch up on the techniques.  

So as usual, I had to prep H about going to the class. I was quite surprised he did not reject the idea when I told him we'll be going for a math class at Math Monkey (I also made a light joke out of it about monkeys doing math, etc. so that he wouldn't feel intimidated). The first thing the teacher did was to give him an assessment (4-year old paper) to test his level. Of course he wouldn't go into class alone, so Po-Po went in and sat with him. After the test, Po-Po was told to leave the room so that he can continue with the trial lesson but he wouldn't hear of that, so Po-Po left the room and I went in instead.

The trial lesson was at the Green Monkey Troop level with about 6 other kids all around H's age (4+ years old). Today's lesson was about Bigger and Smaller. The teacher drew a staircase and wrote 0 to 10 in ascending order up the stairs. The kids were told that the numbers become bigger as you go up the stairs and smaller as you come down the stairs. They were then told to count 0 to 10 as the teacher pointed up the stairs and 10 to 0 as the teacher pointed down the stairs. Then the teacher wrote pairs of numbers on the board and asked the children which number in each pair was bigger or smaller. This was way too simple for H since he's already mastered his numbers.

Next it was game time. The kids were divided into 2 groups. The teacher will flash a question and whichever group gave the answer first will win 2 points. H actually participated in the game and he was happily beaming away cos his team was leading all the way. The game was to fill in the missing number. E.g. 5, _, 7. Again this was way to easy for H.

After the game, the kids were asked to do a worksheet from their folder. Since H did not have a folder (he's not a student yet), the teacher asked him to go to the board in front and tested him. She asked him to count backwards from 10 to 0 and write the numbers on the board, she gave him more number pairs and asked him to circle the smaller number in each pair, she gave him more fill in the missing number questions - all he did with ease. The teacher then asked him to sit for the 5-year old assessment paper. Again he did it with ease and got all the answers correct.

In the same room, at the back of the class, there were 2 other boys being taught by another teacher. They were learning about division (lesson was on halving). And the teacher had written on the board a list of numbers, something like that (I think they read half of xx = yy):
H20 -> 10
H40 -> 20
.
.
.

H was actually more interested in what the big boys were learning. H asked "mommy what are the kor kor learning?" I told him they're learning halving, e.g. half of 20 is 10. H then said "if you have 40 candies and share, each one will get 20?"

What's my take on Math Monkey?
If you've read my previous post you'd have read that my concern is that these math centres teach techniques to perform calculations but not math concepts. It's good for kids who already have the fundamentals, since all you want out of the programme is to equip them with the techniques to perform mental calculations with speed and accuracy. But for kids who don't have the fundamentals, then we're just training robots to churn out answers without really understanding the meaning of the numbers. I cannot really conclude whether concepts are actually taught in Math Monkey since I've only attended one lesson (and a simple lesson at that - perhaps at the higher levels the lessons are taught differently).

For example, in today's lesson when the kids were taught about bigger and smaller, the teacher asked, "Why is 8 bigger than 4?". I was expecting her to show quantities, something concrete, so that the kids can witness for themselves that 8 is bigger or more than 4. Instead she said, "because it's higher up the stairs", pointing to the stairs she drew on the board. I didn't think that was right. It's perhaps a good way to make the kids remember, but it certainly isn't the right way to teach quantities.

Would I send H to Math Monkey?
If H does not have the strong math concepts that he has, NO! Since he loves numbers and loves doing maths, MAYBE. I'd certainly not send him if he's at the Green Monkey Troop level. For H, he's placed at the Lemur Troop level in which mental math techniques will be introduced. It'll definitely be something new and interesting to him. Besides, participating in the games will help him come out of his 'shy' self.

At the end of the lesson, I asked H whether he enjoyed himself and whether he wanted to go again, he nodded yes. So maybe we'll give it a try :-) 

Learning through play

Learning through play - this is indeed so true! While observing H in his pretend play, I realised just how much he learns by simply indulging in play. These couple of days, he's been playing 'ice-cream shop' - he's the ice-cream seller and everyone else his customers. All he needed for his pretend play was his magnadoodle board (one of the most value for money toys since he's been using it over and over for all kinds of play), some blocks as ice-cream, cookies or whatever there is in his menu, and a stack of cards as money.

Unconsiously while having loads of fun, H is learning how to spell by writing out his menu board, learning math by calculating how much to charge his customers and how much change to give, and learning how to deal with his little sister who just loves disturbing him while he plays.

This is H's menu:

Jelly $1
Cookie $2
Ice cream $3

Spelling
H: Mommy how do you spell cream?
Me: Cream as in ice-cream? C-R-E-A-M

The next day
H: Mommy you don't need to tell me, I can spell ice-cream by myself

Math
H: What would you like?
Me: Triple scoop of vanilla ice-cream with rainbow sprinkles and a cookie
H: There you go!
Me: How much?
H: 3 ice-cream is $9... and a cookie $11 <I'm amazed at his speed of calculation>
Me: There you go, $15. How much change do I get?
H: <Hid in the corner and counted with his fingers> $4

Emotional intelligence
H: Mommy, L is taking away my cookies! <in all his whininess while trying to hit his sister>
Me: It's ok, she just wants to play with you
H: No, she can't play!

L loves provoking H to evoke a reaction. Perhaps it's her way to get his attention. The way to deal with her is to simple ignore her actions, or distract her with something else. After explaining this to H, I told H to include L as his assistant or give her something else to play with. There, settled! No more whining, crying and fighting.

the true meaning of unschooling

I came across this post by LearningBeyondSchooling. How timely - just what I needed to reaffirm myself that it is ok not to have a fixed schedule for H when he's out of school next year. I guess we, being parents, can never get the kiasu-ness out of us, no matter how un-kiasu we think we are. On one hand, we recognise that kids should be kids and they should be allowed to enjoy their childhood and indulge in free play. On the other hand, we're afraid that they will miss out on opportunities to acquire new skills or hone their talent if structured learning is not provided. Hence the dilemma.

Our intention for taking H out of school next year is to allow him to PLAY but along the way we unconsciously get sucked back into the 'box', i.e. needing to find classes / activities to fill H's time - tennis, swimming, music, art, mandarin, etc. and the list goes on...

I would really appreciate to hear from parents who homeschool their kids. How do you do it?

home sweet home

Just got back from our family holiday in Perth. It is our first holiday abroad with both kids and hubs vowed not to take them anywhere until they are much older. I guess hubs idea of a good holiday is a relaxing one where you just sit back and do nothing. But with kids, you end up being more tired than ever... hahaha.

But it was a good trip nonetheless. At least for the kids (I hope). As soon as H hit home, he went on his days as usual without a single mention of the trip. I guess he's one of those who lives in the moment and does not care much about the past. Unlike L, she has vivid memory of the trip (for now at least). Every single waking moment she would ask to look at the videos or photos taken of the trip. She would also randomly talk about the things she saw or did at the farm or at the zoo.

Lessons learnt? Don't try to be too ambitious when going on hols with young kids. They're just happy spending time with family doing simple things like playing in the park, going to the pool, etc. For our next family holiday, we should just check into a beach resort :-)