Tennis is the best first sport

H's first encounter with tennis was when we took him to a trial lesson at Monster Tennis. He was still very clingy then and refused to participate although I could sense that he longed to play those games they did. But he simply refused to get onto the court. Oh well, we never went back since I did not want to waste my money if he wasn't going to participate.

Fast forward to now, H is enjoying his tennis lessons. Why tennis? I read that tennis is a great first sport for kids. It helps develop the greatest number of skills required for the greatest number of other sports and activities (see chart below). So hopefully with a good grounding in these skills, he'll grow to love and enjoy an array of sporting activities!



A little description on how tennis develops the above skills:

1. Throwing. The service and overhead motion in tennis is identical to baseball and football
2. Catching. The soft-hand skills required for volleying, as well as dropshots, lobs, and other touch shots in tennis are terrific catching skill-builders for other sports
3. Striking. Anyone who has played tennis knows how much easier tennis makes learning all other racquet sports. Studies have proven significant carry-overs from one racquet sport to others, as well as to other striking activities like baseball and hockey
4. Running & Striking. This very specific skill is one of the most challenging features of tennis, and one of the most valuable skill-builders a developing athlete can master
5. Movement Rhythm. Sports educators are now broadly beginning to emphasize the importance of rhythm in sports, although dance teachers have long expounded its benefits. Because tennis is a continuous rhythm activity, it offers many timing and rhythm benefits not available from many other sports
6. 3-Step Movement Pattern. Almost all baseline movement can be covered in three steps
7. Aerobic. Although tennis is accepted as more anaerobic than aerobic, the aerobic benefits of playing tennis are very high as compared to other sports such as baseball or golf
8. Anaerobic. Competitive and moderate tennis scored near the top of the list when comparing calories burned by different activities over a 3-hour period. This makes tennis a wonderful first sport to build both stamina and strength in children
9. Team-building. Most junior tennis classes are organised in a group learning environment, encouraging a team atmosphere within an individual sport

Kids Tennis

H has been attending tennis lessons for a while now. Initially we got him a coach for one-to-one lessons at our clubhouse. Although he seemed to enjoy his tennis lessons, we found it a little monotonous. For 1/2 hour each lesson, the coach just fed him balls to hit. Not much of coaching there I'd say, and the lessons weren't cheap.

Earlier this year, we (my sis and I) saw this Groupon deal for 8 tennis lessons by Gee Tennis Academy and jumped on it. So far, H and my niece C have been attending the lessons under coach Gee and they are having fun! The lessons are more interactive, and since it's a group lesson, the kids will also get to make new friends (hopefully).

I must say coach Gee is pretty good with kids. I mean, if H is happy to go for lessons it means the coach is doing something right cos he's not easy to please. The only qualm I have is the timing of the public group sessions. For H's age group, weekday sessions are at 6pm which won't work for us cos it's dinner time plus we'll be stuck in traffic trying to get home after the lesson, but location wise it's better (TTDI Community Complex).  Weekend sessions are held in Subang (3K Sports Complex) which is not an ideal location for us. The morning sessions at 9am can also be very very hot as the court is on the roof top - so the kids don't just get tired from the workout, but from the intense heat.

We'd really like for H to continue his lessons with coach Gee after our Groupon sessions end next month. I wonder if I can get enough kids to form a private group at our clubhouse. That way, we can pick a convenient time and also don't have to travel :-)

Best Legoland family deal

The school holidays are approaching and I'm so tempted to take the kids to Legoland in Johor. Not sure about Hubs, but I should be able to take some time off next week. Hopefully he can too so we don't have to go on weekends (read CROWD!). I miss my little girl so much, have not seen her in 3 days due to my busy work schedule. By the time I got home these past 3 days, she was already in bed. Couldn't catch her in the mornings too since I left home before she was up. Anyway, I'm digressing.

Back to Legoland. Tickets bought online (7 days in advance) will cost us RM312 (after 20% discount) for 2 adults and 1 child. L enters free since she's under 3 years old. Yippee!

But... with some clever manipulation of the ongoing promotions out there, the best deal for a family of 2 adults and 2 kids like ours is only RM231. A savings of RM81. Double YIPPEE!

This is how.

1. Buy a box of Kelloggs cereal - the voucher allows you to get a free child ticket with the purchase of an adult ticket at full price (RM140). So RM140 will take care of the tickets for Daddy and H.
2. Buy a pack of Mamee Monster - the voucher gives you 35% off a normal priced adult / child / senior citizen ticket. So RM91will get momster me an adult ticket.
3. L enters for free anyway, so total moolah to fork out = RM231

Time to go grab those Coco Pops and Mamee!

Reward chart

Fellow parents will understand when I say how hard it is to get your kids to listen to you sometimes or rather most of the time. After my failed attempt to teach H how to save by having him earn his pocket money from performing chores, I came up with a reward chart. The initial idea was to list down simple chores he needs to do (including good behaviorial traits) and he will get rewarded with a star on a daily basis for compliance. The stars can then be exchanged for pocket money at the end of the week. But Hubs disagreed - we shouldn't pay him for good behaviour or routine chores. So I've given up on the pocket money front, he will still be getting stars, each star will give him 5 minutes on the iPad :-)

The thing with kids, they are so easily bribed. Now they make it a point to remember to put away their toys, not to whine and throw tantrum, etc. just to earn stars. Best thing is, the simple joy of getting rewarded with stars is good enough, e.g. for L, she doesn't even expect to get anything out of the stars. To her simple mind, getting a star is a reward on its own.

H's reward chart

Using a pocket wall chart is a great idea so that you don't have to keep printing the chart, plus you can change the chores/behaviourial traits as and when you need to. Every night, I'll go down the list and ask H if he complied, if so, I'll insert a star into the pocket. Easy-peasy!

H's exam results

H got back all his exam papers today. He did extremely well. No wonder his English and Science teacher asked if we revised with him cos he got 97.5% for English (due to a careless mistake) and 100% for Science. Now she must think we are super kiasu parents... hahaha!

He also did really well in his Bahasa Malaysia paper which is rather a surprise. He got 95% for the paper. This time we can't blame careless mistakes for the 5% - I think he really couldn't remember some of the BM words and spelling. Oh well, 95% is amazing considering he didn't study for it.

I'm a happy mom cos I know now (with certainty) that I can be totally hands-free with H on the academic side. Yeah!

Now we need to work on his social and emotional side. Sigh...

math exam results

H got back his math exam paper. He got 84%, not bad for someone who didn't revise. I looked through the paper - he would have gotten 90% if not for careless mistakes. It's funny how he made careless mistakes on the simplest of questions, but for the more tricky ones, he got them all right. The other 10% I don't think he would have gotten since I'm quite certain he doesn't know how to spell words like hexagon, twelve, etc.

Parenting best practice is to praise effort and give encouragement! So here goes...

Praise effort
Mommy saw your maths paper, you got 42/50, that's really good.
I like that you try to spell the words even though you don't know how to...

Give encouragement
Mommy knows you can count the objects, you just didn't count carefully. Next time you count slowly or count it twice like this...
See now the teacher wrote down the spelling for you, next time you will know how to spell the words :-)

Great job H, gimme 5!!

****

H was beaming with pride. The paper wasn't that difficult. I'm sure if drilled, most kids would have been able to score 100%.

Po-Po said that when she went to pick H up from school last Friday, H's English and Science teacher asked if we revise much with H at home. Po-Po said not really. Oops, that can only mean 2 things - he either aced his exams, or flunk really badly. We shall find out soon...

my noisy kids

Whenever we take the kids out, we never fail to attract stares from the public. Our little rascals are the nosiest kids ever. They are just so happy and carefree that they don't give a hoot where they are. Everywhere's like a playground to them.

Last Saturday, I took the kids to Waterfront @ Desa Parkcity to grab lunch. It's the closest place to home that's hassle free to park. We went to Rakuzen. I didn't know H is so crazy over sushi. As soon as we sat down he told me what he wanted (although he already had lunch at home). Of course L followed suit but I didn't bother ordering her any since I knew she wouldn't eat them.

So while waiting for the food to arrive, my kids started to make music. They were oblivious to the fact that they were in a restaurant full of diners trying to enjoy their meals. They happily stood on the bench and danced and sang to the beat of their chopsticks, on top of their voice! Some of the diners were amused and some not. What can I do? It's not like they'd listen to me if I told them to stop so I just let them be. At least they were happy and having fun!

 

But that thought came a little too soon cos when the sushi arrived, the kids started fighting. L wanted to take a piece but H wouldn't let her, "They're mine! I ordered 2!" But L wouldn't take no for a no (as usual) so she put her hand onto H's plate and grabbed a piece. Sigh, now everyone's looking cos H was shouting and L was crying. Everyone must think I'm such a stingy mommy for not ordering more, or a bias mommy for not ordering for the girl.

Please someone remind me not to take the kids out to restaurants next time...

Bugging nightmares

H has been having nightmares recently. He would wake up in the middle of the night shouting for mommy. In all his nightmares, there's one recurring theme - bugs! First it was spiders, then ants, then bees, and last night cockroaches. Usually it's about him being attacked my the insects (I think). I try not to ask questions so as not to disrupt his sleep. Normally I'd just reassure him that there's no bugs in his room and that mommy is here.

Normally dreams or nightmares occur when your subconscious mind is trying to make sense of your emotions or the things that are happening in your life, whether you know it or not. I'm beginning to wonder what is actually bothering him for him to be getting these nightmares.  A quick googling revealed that dreaming about insects often indicates that something is annoying or pestering him/her. It further revealed that if a person dreams that he/she is completely surrounded or overwhelmed by insects, he/she is probably so annoyed by something or someone that he/she is ready to freak out. Oops, this sounds like the subject of H's dream. Should I be concern?

Here are interpretations of the said insects from H's dreams (from my google research):

1. Ants: It could mean that the person is feeling "ansty", or ressless. Ants also can symbolise the small annoyances and irritations in our daily lives.
2. Bees: Bees are usually a good omen, they symbolise wealth, good luck, harmony, creativity and bliss. However, if you get stung by one, it may indicate that you have been wronged. Maybe you have been hurt by some stinging remark.
3. Spiders: To see a spider in your dream indicates that you are feeling like an outsider in some situation. The spider is also symbolic of feminine power or an overbearing mother figure in your life. However, if to see a spider spinning a web in your dream signifies that you will be rewarded for your hard work.
4. Cockroaches: Dreaming of cockroaches generally means there is a part of your life you feel you need to confront and possibly change. It can represent a need for renewal or self-cleaning of your emotional or spiritual being.

Apparently dreaming of bugs is one the top 10 nightmares among children. I'm not sure if that's supposed to be reassuring, i.e. everything's normal and there's nothing to worry about. According to Dr. Gillian Holloway in her article "Your Child's Top 10 Nightmares and Dreams Explained", children are prone to dreaming about insects in their bed or a swarm of bugs coming into their room at night (sounds very much like H to me). I quote from her article:

"What you need to know:
This is a dream that may recur a few times with varying degrees of agitation. It is a common dream for youngsters to experience when they are facing unpredictable situations, such as a separation in the marriage, moving into a new home or a new sibling being brought home. There is no single catalyst or interpretation for the attacking insects; rather, the frightening dream seems to reflect a sense of bewilderment and being overwhelmed. Arguments, unexpected changes and feeling as if she has no control over events may trigger repetitions of the dream. If your child has this dream, do what you can to give her some sense of control, or at least a voice in her own fate. Point out stability where it still exists, and help things to be as smooth and predictable as possible. And do what you can to manage your own anxiety, for she may pick it up and feel unsettled even though you aren't saying much about the situation."

Has this all to do with H trying to adjust to the big school?

My Art Studio

Since H is no longer going for his edudrama class, I thought it would be good for him to try out art lessons. When I told Hubs about this, his reaction was, "we need to be smart about choosing the programmes for our kids cos weekends are precious, and art isn't a priority!" Why not? I totally disagree. Art is not just about sketching and colouring, it's more than that but most people just don't see the value in it. Anyway, I was quite adamant about H taking on art. I asked H if he wanted to go for a trial lesson and he said yes. He was actually quite excited about going to the art class (perhaps it's more to do with being with his cousin who's also attending the same art class).

I must say I'm really happy with My Art Studio. For the first time, H was actually keen to participate. I had no problem getting him into the class, he went in on his own. I also had no problem leaving him there on his own (I can't be sitting there waiting for him for 2 hours). Perhaps it's really cos his cousin is there, but they aren't in the same class so it's not like they get to interact during the lesson. But what I'm really happy about is that the teachers are really engaging. You can tell that they really adore kids, which is perhaps why H took to the teachers quite readily.

One point to note about choosing the right art school is to look at the children's work. In some schools, kids are taught how to draw and colour (almost prescriptive) so the work produced by the kids are almost identical. For me that's a big no no! The reason for sending H to an art school is to nurture his creativity and confidence in expressing himself.

Last week, the kids were told stories about Duan Wu Jie (Dragon Boat or Dumpling Festival) and were shown actual images of the different elements related to the festival (e.g. dumplings, dragon boat race, etc.). They were then asked to create their own masterpiece based on their interpretation of the festival. When I went to pick H up, I was pretty impressed with the masterpieces created by the kids. They were all so different, and so creative. H drew daddy and him among dumplings hanging from the top. The girl sitting next to him drew a colourful dragon. The drawings are all 'kid like' and that's what I like cos you know they are really their original masterpiece.

* Disclaimer: I speak only from my experience with one particular My Art Studio outlet

Social and emotional development in kids

Sometimes I wonder if parents are the ones thinking or worrying too much. Here I am, barely 3 months since H entered the big school, and I'm already considering taking him out. It's not that H's school is not good, I just don't think that it suits him now (maybe if he was older I'd think differently). So anyway, I went to check out this Waldorf-inspired preschool yesterday. I know I mentioned before that while I like Waldorf's play-based philosophy (kids are free to play, imagine and create), I've never considered a Waldorf school for H since I don't quite agree that kids are not exposed to anything academic. I don't want to sound kiasu, but some kids are more than ready to learn academic subjects (in a fun way of course)! Anyway, my reason for going against my original stance is that I think H would benefit from an environment in which his social and emotional skills get developed. He doesn't really need more academic inputs. Perhaps being in an environment in which he gets to just play and interact with kids would be more beneficial for him.

Before I visited the school, I was already quite convinced that the Waldorf-inspired school is the way to go for H. But the school visit was somewhat disappointing. The teacher who showed me around didn't really understand nor address my concerns. I'm not sure if it's the language barrier. The school's supposed to be English based, but I felt this particular teacher's command of English isn't quite up to mark (perhaps the reason why she couldn't respond to my queries). So I'm torn - it has a good reputation for happy children and caring teachers. Should I ditch my lousy experience from this visit and register H anyway? I don't really want to keep changing schools, so I have to make sure that the next school H goes to is the one for him. Besides, the fees aren't cheap. I remember telling my Waldorf-trained sis (the one's who's been encouraging me to put H into the Waldorf school) once "Why need to pay so much for H to go play in school? He can just play at home!" I still think what I said is true since we don't restrict H's playtime at home. In fact, he plays all day at home. And he doesn't need toys, he's got fantastic imagination.

Last night I asked H if he had fun in school and he said yes. I then asked if he's starting to like his big school, he said no! Kids are really funny, you really have to ask the right question cos I would have assumed fun = like, but apparently not! He told me again that his current school is just learn learn learn and no play. I told him that he can learn in school and play at home, but he disagreed, "I also want to play in school!"

Well I guess H needs more than just play, he needs to have friends to play with. And this is extremely important as only through play and interaction with others would kids develop the ability to understand their own emotions, read and comprehend emotional states in others, manage strong emotions and their expression in a constructive manner, regulate one’s own behavior, develop empathy for others, and establish and maintain relationships. These are all what you can't teach in an academic setting.

I found another school today which claims to nurture well rounded kids, balancing both intellectual and emotional development in a fun manner. Sounds really promising. Will have to check it out.

Private swimming lesson

I'm so glad we found a really good coach for H. Today's his first swimming lesson outside school and he really enjoyed the session, no tears, just laughter! He even managed to put his head into the water and held his breath for 10 seconds. I wish I was there to witness the session. Po-Po was just full of praise for the coach. Not only did he manage to get H into the pool and learn the basics (blow bubbles and float like a star), he made H laughed and giggled :-)

When I got home, I told H that mommy's really proud of him cos he managed to put aside his fear and went into the pool. H told me, "I'm scared at first but after that I'm happy!" I think he must have felt a sense of accomplishment too. He then showed me how he put his head into the water and blow bubbles. "The coach is also very funny. He makes silly jokes!"

Now I just can't wait for H to start swimming independently :-)

Bedtime routine

I really have to rethink the kids' bedtime routine. They're both reluctant to go to bed and it's a struggle every night. It takes at least an hour to finally get them settled in bed, and that doesn't mean they fall asleep immediately. No wonder H can't wake up in the morning (my poor boy has to wake up at 6:30am), and I swear he's getting eye bags from the lack of sleep (he won't nap in the afternoon).

Here's how it goes every night.

8pm: Mommy me will yell "OK enough, stop playing everyone goes upstairs!" which will be met with defiance "No, I still want to play!" I will then turn off the lights in the living room and start marching upstairs, "Mommy is going up, you can stay and play if you want but I'm going up!" That usually gets their attention. On a good day, they'll race each other up the stairs. On a bad day, one or both of them will start whining or throw a fit!

8.15pm-8.30pm: Depending on luck, I finally get them both upstairs, but getting them changed and brushing their teeth is another battle. Their favourite game is to chase each other along the corridor and from room to room, while I try to keep my patience checked. "Stop running dear, come here and brush your teeth..." I'll be repeating this over and over until my patience runs out then I'll resort to threatening him "That's it, I'm gonna ask kakak to come get you ready" or physically dragging him into the room. Since I can only handle one kid at a time (cos it's running late and H needs to go to bed), the nanny usually takes the other (L by default) which on most nights result in her throwing a fit "I don't want you, I want mommy!"

8:30pm: Gosh, already so late! "It's late already, time to sleep." which will be met by "I want a story first". "OK just one story then you have to sleep, promise?" But after one story, it'll be "I want another story!" or "I want to drink milo", or "I want to chit chat", etc.

9pm-9.30pm: Again depending on luck, the kids are finally settled.

So really, if I want H to sleep by 8:30pm (so that he gets 10 hours of sleep), I'll have to shoo them upstairs by 7:30pm latest. Sometimes I'm not even home by 7:30pm. How lah?!!!

Dilemma

4 Reasons To Ditch Academic Preschools | Janet Lansbury

I like the above post. It captures exactly my thoughts. H is one of those preschoolers who has a knack for letters and numbers, and has, through his own interest and initiative 'thought' himself to read, spell and do math. He's coping well academically in his current school (which is overly academic) but I just feel that what he needs is not more academic learning but nurturing his self-esteem and confidence, learning how to socialise and self-regulate, etc.

Last night, I asked H if he likes his school. He gave me an affirmative no. When probed further this was his exact answer, "We only learn learn learn and don't play, so boring!". I can really feel for him. Classes run from 8am-2pm with 2 short breaks in between. That's a really long day for a kid if all they do is academic learning, with no play time in between. "I like SA (his previous preschool), we get to play and learn, not just learn learn learn!"

If H was older, I would probably tell him that well, life is not a bed of roses so deal with it. Maybe not in such words but you get my drift. Kids should not be over-protected nor overly-pampered. But H is only 4.5 years old. I'm not sure if the lack of sleep, or the overly academic school is taking a toll on his emotional wellbeing. My sis and mom seemed to have noticed that H's temper is getting from bad to worse. He seemed to have had it under control for a while but ever since he started schooling (in his new school), he's more short fused. Simple things get him agitated and he will burst out in anger. My sis has been nagging me about my decision to send H to such an academic school whereby kids are pushed to learn so much so young, about introducing unnecessary stress to him, etc. I always just brushed her off, "Where got stress? It's not like he's struggling, he is actually coping well!"

I don't agree to push a child beyond their developmental readiness, but I also don't agree to delay a child's learning. For H, he's a fast and keen learner so he's definitely ready to learn everything that's taught in school with ease. But now taking a step back to reconsider, I guess there's really no need to introduce more academic subjects into H's life. Instead we should focus on his weaknesses. But pulling him out of school after the first semester means forfeiting the hefty deposit we paid. The only way to get back the full refund is to put in a notice of withdrawal before June and only leave at the end of the year. Hub's ok either way, "Money you can earn, but you can't buy back childhood". Sometimes he does have spurts of wisdom, hahaha.

So what should I do? Put aside all these nagging feelings and stay the course (praying that all will trun out well in the end), or do something (which may not necesarily turn out to be right)?

Have I made the wrong school choice?

H's classmate celebrated her birthday yesterday and it was a great opportunity for the mommies to get together while the kids played. H's school is one of very few private schools with no PTA so parents don't get a chance to 'gang up' and voice our concerns.  Our topic of conversation was of course around kids and education. Everyone was asking about the March exams and wanted to know how the other mommies are approaching it. I told them frankly that I'm just going to let H sit for the exams. If he does well, good, if not, I'm not too bothered either. C'mon, the kids are only 4-5 years old. There must be better things for them to do at home (like play) than to study for exams.

The more I get to know about the school (from other parents and from my own observations), the more I have this nagging feeling that we have made the wrong choice. I can't help wishing that we had stuck to our original idea, i.e. to give H a year out. I feel so kesian that he has to wake up so early in the morning and that I have to rush him to bed every night (I know he wants to spend more time with mommy, I do too but there's no choice else he won't get sufficient sleep). I'm also beginning to wonder if he'll lose interest in learning. Too much academic work too early will definitely kill the joy of learning. Learning should be associated with fun rather than homework and exams! H used to proactively ask for worksheets (he thinks it's cool to be like the big kor kor /cheh cheh with homework to do) but these days he finds homework more a chore than something he enjoys doing for fun.

Anyway, I digressed. Back to school choices. We're almost quite certain now, after having experienced private (international) schooling that perhaps it's really just a hype. Are private schools really better? Is the international syllabus really better? Not necessarily. It all boils down to the quality of teachers and the school management (who determines the philosophy of teaching / learning the school adopts).  Unfortunately this is something difficult to assess unless you experience it first hand as some schools are just really good at marketing. So not all private schools are good, and certainly not all public schools are bad. One of the mommies I spoke to at the party admitted that she actually regretted putting her daughter (who's in Year 2) in the international stream. As with all choices, there are the pros and cons. Thankfully H is only 4+ years old so we still have time to decide whether to continue with the international stream or put him in the SJK(C) stream. Meantime, we have to decide if we should let him continue with Reception, take him out of school, or put him in a play-based kindy.

Do parents these days think too much?

March Exams

H's school first quarter (March) exam syllabus for Reception. Looks pretty intimidating, but I have full confidence in H. He seems to have a good grasp of all that is taught in school since he doesn't need guidance when doing his homework (I take that as he knows the subjects well). He only needs reminding to finish his homework and not dilly dally. So exams or not, I'm not going to succumb my little boy into studying. He's just too young to be spending time studying for exams.

Bahasa Malaysia. Not sure how strong his BM is but hopefully his good memory serves him well

Math. H claims it's easy peasy...

English. Shouldn't be a problem since he speaks English at home

English Spelling. Good thing is H has a strong grasp in phonics so spelling is easy for him

Science. Seems like a lot of topics but what is covered in each topic is actually quite basic

Exam time-table

Don't you agree this is too much for a 4.5-year old? I still think kids this young should not be tested!

Primary school online registration

Just completed the online registration for H's entry into a chinese primary school, easy peasy... in case you can't find the link on the MOE webpage (took me some time to look for the link), this is it http://apps.moe.gov.my/esppsel/

Now I'll have to go bug our tenant for the latest utility bills so that I can complete the registration process. I wonder if I should take H to the school when I hand in the documents. He did ask if he was going to the same big school as C cheh cheh (his cousin) when he's a big boy :-)